Climbing Up the Rock

Joshua and I have been together for almost 8 years now, and it sounds so weird to say. I have spent more time with him than I have in post-high school education. Anyway, enough reminiscing.

One of the things we vowed to each other when we wed 5 years ago was to keep our brains and our bodies in shape for each other. That might sound really shallow, but essentially, it was a vow to keep learning and doing things that we love doing together.

As a foodie, it's easy to become enthralled in activities that draw me into different circles, leaving Josh behind. At the same time, as an outdoor enthusiast, Josh could meet friends who enjoy hiking a little more than I do. It's easy for us to say, "Okay, see you back home." We work hard not to let that happen, so I try to accompany him on as many outdoor things as he does for me at restaurants and markets. I am working off quite a deficit, you see.

Well, a few weekends ago Joshua had the opportunity to do the Marmot Rock Out hosted to woo REI employees. He kindly took me with him to 8 Mile Campground, Leavenworth, WA. I was a little bit skeptical, because I'm not a "gear junkie" who has a different sleeping bag for different weather conditions (who wants to camp in snow anyway?) or bicycles for asphalt conditions. But, I went along, because he loves being outdoors, and I love seeing him happy. Lucky for me, karma was on my side, and I had a great time.

We joined the bouldering group from the camp out and headed out to some "problems" less than a mile from our campsite. I haven't bouldered before, so I was pretty nervous. Bouldering is skillfully clambering up rocks without ropes to catch you if you fall, so you're not climbing very high. Several experienced climbers schlepped "crash pads" to cushion a climber's crash, and I eyed the puffy pads with some skepticism. What if I bounced off?

I decided to climb up a side of one of the rock problems everyone else was trying. This rock was wedged into the side of a hill, so it had a flat-ish face and a lumpy side. I crawled around on the lumpy side. Josh decided he could go up the flat face. What he hung onto, I'll never know. I stared at the face for a few minutes and then resumed my scramble up the side. After successfully climbing the extremely rocky staircase, I decided to try an actual problem.

Josh directed me to a side problem, and he helped me get my first step. I got about halfway up the problem -- it was probably 15 feet tall - I got seriously stuck. I was all spread-eagled on the wall with no idea of how to shift my weight. Then I heard it: people had stopped climbing their problems and had begun staring at me. "Move your right hand to that hold there." "Shift your left foot up here." And so forth. It's both incredibly intimidating and inspiring to finish a climb when a dozen REI staff members are staring and your -ahem - feet and legs and suggesting different ways to accomplish the climb. I tried to listen for Josh's voice, and gradually, he and a few others guided me up the rest of the rock. Several tense minutes that were each an hour long, I summitted my first bouldering rock and experienced a rush of adrenaline that I think you would feel if you won a race or accomplished something you were pretty sure you were going to fail.

Well, that accomplishment achieved something Josh had really been hoping for: I loved climbing. It was extremely challenging, and I'm going along slowly to avoid injuring my shoulder, but I really look forward to each climbing trip. Okay, we've only been on one other with Ingrid and JoJo.

The other is that I have found the climbing community to be extremely giving and close-knit. When we were at the Marmot Rock Out, a celebrity climber, Beth Rodden, joined the camp to help promote the product and unify the campers. She shared her incredible story with us, and I was struck by how the community of climbers gathered around her when she had to become re-motivated to climb. I also found her to be a humble woman who loved climbing but also enjoyed hearing from us. We had the rare opportunity to take her to Seattle after the camp trip and explore some of the dairy free and gluten free bakeries around the city, because that was an interest she and I shared. We were also blessed by the generosity of one pair of climbers/REI employees working in Santa Fe, Amanda and Derek, who gave me a gift certificate for climbing shoes. They encouraged me to continue going up and enjoying myself. What a community.

Last weekend, we went on our second climbing adventure. This time, we drove south to Tacoma and met up with Ingrid, a dear friend of Josh from high school. She and her boyfriend JoJo are climbers who have adventured all over the place. JoJo is also a climbing instructor at the local climbing gym. Ingrid is an occupational therapist whose knowledge of body mechanics makes her a talented climber. JoJo and Ingrid took the afternoon to help me learn the basics of climbing - like tying your harness and belaying - while Josh encouraged me to stretch myself in a weird craggy climb. He kindly took some candid pictures of me as well.

It's so fun to have an activity that we both enjoy fully. Although I'm not a marriage expert, I think that has been the key to our marriage so far. Keep doing things we both enjoy, and do those activities that the other loves just as much as you enjoy your hobbies. Seek out new activities that you can share. Support each others dreams. Date.